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Miserable, You Confess by ~dearesthelpless:icondearesthelpless:

Categories Literature > Poetry > General Poetry > Open


this whisper i whisper is a secret
keeping it alive only to decieve it

i let you hold me close to the edge
unable to see just where you transgressed
i know you're dead inside, reflections are winter
your eyes tell the truth, and we splinter

you push aside how everyone else feels
ignorance to the carelessness you posess
turning the cheek to never notice anything
until you're left alone, miserable you confess
©2004-2009 ~dearesthelpless
:icondearesthelpless:

Author's Comments

I wrote this about certain people I know, and how they sort of hurt me, but didnt know it. Where I thought I could trust them, but it kind of got tainted, but they didnt know they were hurting me, they just had their head turned the whole time unknowingly.

Comments


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:iconpurpleblobofgoo:
~purpleblobofgoo Oct 11, 2004, 9:31:26 AM
I love the second stanza. I like this poem as short as it is, but I feel like it could be extended. Mmhm. The flow is good, and it's.. melodic enough, for lack of better terms, to be a song, but again it'd have to be extended so that it wouldn't be repetitive. Good stuff. I can dig it.

--
<3 Kristen
:iconthezimchick:
~thezimchick Oct 11, 2004, 12:00:16 PM
wow. i love this! you're a great writer, and some of your rhymes here are unique (which is always a good thing!) i love the first couplet, and the last stanza. especially the last line, since the title fits in perfectly. but, well, great! +fav.

--
//thezimchick

{the truth is out there}
{and so are sheep!}

:alien:
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October 10, 2004
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